Amazing Zippered Woman

The chocolate I’d eaten, the cocktails galore,
Had all made my body a sight to abhor.

When I climbed on the scale, I nearly passed out.
The number so large, “You’re FAT” it did shout.

I paused to remember, all the goodies consumed.
These were the reason my ass had ballooned.

The wine and the eggnog, the chips and the dip.
It would appear, had gone right to my hips.

As I dressed in my sweat pants and old army tent,
I shouted and screamed in order to vent.

I cried and I yelled, for the whole world to hear,
“I can’t wear a tent for the rest of the year.”

Every food that is fattening and good to the taste,
Must go in the trash. OH, WHAT A WASTE.

No bread for me and potatoes are banned.
Only veggies and yogurt - I’m not such a fan.

My tummy and arms will jiggle no more.
I’ll starve myself silly.  Oh what a bore.

When March brings a hint of glorious Spring,
The world around Shanlee will actually sing.

With musical words like skinny and thin,
And no hint at all of that old double chin.