RING In The New Year

December 31, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 0 Comments

Yesterday morning the whole bunch was gathered in Mike and Carol’s family room having a quick organizational meeting before our shopping trip to Ojai, when I noticed a small bag in Roscoe’s pocket. When I reached for it, with a questioning look on my face, Meghann nearly shoved me to the ground as she shouted, “Don’t touch that.”  I remember thinking that that she might have overreacted - just a bit. Then I started to give some serious thought to what THAT BAG could possibly contain.  I attempted to surreptitiously examine it from every angle, but I must admit it was hard to appear casual. As Meghann switched Roscoe’s position, I suddenly noticed a second bag protruding from his other pocket. I knew better than to ask questions, so I simply pretended that I hadn’t noticed it.  WHAT COULD THOSE BAGS POSSIBLY CONTAIN? Deep in thought, I ran through several scenarios.

Maybe Meghann had stolen some of Carol’s jewelry and she was using her son to smuggle the loot out of the house. Or even more logical, Scott and Meghann were running drugs to and from Mexico and using that poor, wee child as their “horse.” Could it be possible that MPG  (My Precious Grandson) had some mysterious illness and was forced to carry his medication in two small, green silk bags?  Our the worst possibility - maybe Meghann had stolen some of my jewelry.

I was almost frantic when Meghann calmly said, “Mom and Dad, Roscoe has a gift for you to celebrate your 30th wedding anniversary.” She handed each of us one of the small bags. Inside we discovered new wedding rings - new gorgeous wedding rings. They were designed by our children and specially made just for us. The rings are made from titanium and gold and engraved on the inside. Two years ago Meghann posted about our original wedding rings, and she told Dear Readers about the engraving inside our rings. The words, “It’s a good thing.” have been inside our rings for thirty years. Our new rings have the words, “It’s still a good thing.” We sure have thoughtful kids.


It’s still a good thing.
Thank you, Perpetua. 



Hi Ho, Ojai - We’re Off To See Our Guy

December 30, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 0 Comments

(F.Y.I. - “Ojai” is pronounced “Oh Hi”) So this is a very clever title. And you all know who “Our Guy” is - none other than our wonderful grandson, Roscoe William Roberts.  Tom and I left at 5:30 a.m. yesterday morning to drive to Ojai, California to spend some time with Carol and Mike, Roscoe’s other grandparents. They have a beautiful home in the mountains near this quaint little town. They have buffalo, horses, dogs, cats and even a tractor. It’s a very fun place to visit - and we laugh a lot. Katie and Henry arrived last night from the bay area, and Scott’s sister, Stacey and her husband John are arriving today. Shortly after we arrived, we hit a local winery for a wine-tasting experience. That kinda set the tone for the weekend. We tasted one of the best of sauvignon blancs I have ever tasted.

Today we have shopping in Ojai planned and I think we’re going to get the Big Irishman on the tractor. After all, he must earn his keep. Scooping Buffalo woopoodies is a nasty job, but someone has to do it. My contribution will be sitting on the fence and posing in my new western wear - boots, chaps, spurs and a cowboy hat.  I must say - cowgirl Shanlee paints a very tantalizing picture. I’m sure the next few days will generate many wonderful memories as well and several thousand pictures. I’ll be posting periodically to share these “good times” with you.

Before I sign off, I want to share a few pics from Roscoe’s first visit to Arizona. Meghann and Scott are doing an incredible job of providing “Little Dude” (as his dad calls him) with many experiences. I think that often first-time parents have a tendency to cocoon their babies at home. Meghann and Scott take Roscoe everywhere - restaurants, on car trips, shopping, and yes, even wineries. (He prefers REDS.) Their willingness to put up with the minor equipment hassles involved when ”cruisin” with a baby  is really paying off. Roscoe is an incredibly good baby and adapts to almost any situation.

   

A delightful centerpiece for Grandmov’s table.


His Holiness, Pope Roscoe William I.


Aunt Esther tells Roscoe a story while Grandpav listens.


Uncle Patrick tells Roscoe all about chicks.

The Big Irishman just got up and these are his first words to us,
 “You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.”



Please Allow Me To Share

December 27, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 1 Comment

It’s not often that I read an opinion piece that totally makes sense. This finally explains in a logical way why the Republicans have made illegal immigration such a big deal. This was written by Robert Kistner and was published in the Mesa Tribune on Wednesday, December 26th, 2007. Mr. Kistner states that he “is involved in education and business.”

GOP needs villain, found one in “illegals’
Creating monsters comes easier than solutions.

Son, here’s tonight’s Republican bedtime story.
Once upon a time, there was a national political party that had been in power for 14 years, but was in a panic because its policies had failed. There was a trillion dollar deficit, a health care crisis, the country’s infrastructure was decaying, the war was a disaster, and the party’s leader, the president, was widely disliked.

So one day the leaders of this party called in people who worked for them in their think tanks and said, “Well, what the heck do we do now? It seems like we’re cooked.”

“Oh no, no, no, no!” responded the men in the black-and-tweed suits, whose eyes seemed to roll around in their sockets, as if they had been doing a lot of thinking. “We have another plan, you know, another Strategic Initiative that will distract the people from those other unfortunate issues. This may be the best red herring we’ve come up with yet. We’re going to call it the ‘Immigrant as Monsters’ Strategic Initiative. Remember, it’s all about framing, framing, framing the debate.

“But” responded one of the younger, more inexperienced members of the party, “that won’t work, because most of the immigrants aren’t monsters. They’re mostly just hard-working people who work hard to support their families. And most people know that.”

There was a silence in the room, then thunderous laughter. “He’s new,” one of the senior senators responded. “Son, reality doesn’t have all that much to do with it. We’ve got to motivate our base, and the best way to do it is to create a monster to destroy. There’s got to be fear, so we can protect the people from danger.”

“Heck, the monster can be a person like Saddam Hussein or an idea like unfair taxes. This time it’ll be immigrants. It’s beautiful. Some of the immigrants are illegally here and therefore they are criminals, monsters. Our party will be the hero that rides in to save America from the beasts. This stuff works every time.”

The Think Tankers looked pleased. “We have already planned out some of the details of the Initiative. We’ve got the position papers, the press releases, the preliminary TV ads and the talking points ready, and we have  gotten buy-in from the Noise Machine. Corporate media has totally bought in. Rush and Sean are salivating with expectation. Ailes with FOX is apoplectic with joy. Dobbs is set to demagogue this issue from every imaginable angle. And to think everyone thought we were cooked this year on the issues.”

“It seems wrong to me.” The freshman senator had spoken again. “It seems unethical to just go on a blanket campaign to demonize all those workers. Hey, two of them work for me, landscaping. They’re the hardest workers you can imagine, and polite, and good Catholics. Besides, there are 12 million already in the U.S. You mean we’re going to deport them all or put them in jail? That’s crazy.”

“Besides,” he went on, “it’s not American. It’s not principled. And at least the local media are too smart to buy into this.” 

“What are you talking about? Hey, there’s a columnist in Phoenix who is ready with a column called: ‘If Arizona is lagging, immigration is the reason.’ He actually blames all Arizona’s social problems on the immigrants.”

One of the senior senators grabbed the freshman around the shoulders and said, “Come with me son, I’ll explain to you how this all works.” “Winning politics is based on fear, not fairness or human dignity or rights or all that liberal nonsense. It’s about motivating your base. I’ll buy you some lunch and fill you in on how this all really works. I’ll start by explaining the idea of a Strategic Initiative.”

Well, that’s tonight’s Republican bedtime story, son. And sleep well. Remember, monsters don’t exist unless you think they do.”



He Could Be The One

December 24, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 1 Comment

Shhhhhh! I’m quietly tiptoeing back into the house after secretly snapping this picture of Mary Lou and her new beau leaving for the Christmas formal at the Humane Society. 
At least he wears his glasses to drive. His name is Woofus B. Labovitch and he is seventeen. He has been accepted to Stanford and plans to study journalism. TOM AND I REALLY LIKE HIM. He drives a cute little bug, and even opened the car door for Mary Lou. She looked so cute in her plaid sateen formal. (I got her one of those SPANKS undergarments to kinda downplay her large bum.) She seemed really nervous. As you know liquor has been a problem for ML all of her dating life. Hopefully tonight she will be circumspect. I’ll let you know how her special evening works out. Tom is predicting she will return with a rumpled dress which is a sure indicator that some heavy petting took place. 



Answers to Christmas Questions

December 23, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 0 Comments

Christmas carols are everywhere - in stores, at the dentists office, even in the parking lot at Walmart. I really enjoy Christmas carols. I’m not sure I’d want to listen to them year round, but for six weeks a year they are rather enjoyable. Some Christmas songs are beautiful (Silent Night) and some are just plain silly - who would want a hippo for Christmas? Have you ever seen the size of a hippo woopooties? But there is one particular carol that leaves me wondering every time I hear it. What in the world do leaping lords, French hens, swimming swans and that damn partridge stuck in a tree have to do with Christmas? I became almost obsessed with answering this question. I made the decision to find answers. Consequently, I have spoken to some of the world’s foremost authorities on Christmas. I have spent the last several days perusing vast tomes. (I’ve always wanted to say ”vast tomes”)  I made the decision to find answers. So allow me to enlighten you.

LEAPING LORDS: Apparently in the year 1532, in a small city in rural Rakaboozehstan, 17 noblemen were served some bad fruit cake at an official state dinner. Everything was okay until the wine stopped flowing freely and the plumbing backed up. When their peristaltic rushes (stomach cramps) became compelling, they were forced to “Leap” over the mote to use the facilities at a neighboring castle. So there you have it - “Leaping Lords” explained.

FRENCH HENS: The explanation is simple. The guy who wrote this song was terribly hung over while composing this song, and  six of his front teeth had been knocked out in a bar fight the night before. He meant to say French “HORNS.”

SWIMMING SWANS: I’m not gonna even explain this one. What the hell are swans supposed to do? Maybe we should sing “swans a snorkeling” or “swans a sipping slurpees.”

THE PARTRIDGE: History tells us that hundreds of years ago in a suburb of Chicago called “Dumbville,” the Tivo family was snuggled under down comforters watching reruns of “The Partridge Family.” After the 38th episode, the father, Trenton Tivo, apparently freaked out and grabbed the family’s,  pet partridge, Peerpont,  placed him at the top of the Christmas tree, and began shooting with an AK-47. The partridge was unharmed, but refused to leave his lofty perch for years. I think that the “pear” reference was originally “poor.” After all, a Christmas tree that is left up year after year could most assuredly be referred to as “poor.”

Well - now you know. The next time your hear this particular carol, you will possess a modicum of understanding of its actual meaning. 



An AZW Spout

December 22, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 0 Comments

The holiday season is a time when most people, in what I think is an attempt to downplay the commercialism of the yuletide, walk around spouting altruistic goals for all of mankind and the world in general. What follows is my “spout.”

The United States of America has long been a beacon of hope  for people across the earth. Unfortunately the light from this beacon has dimmed because of the policies of the current administration. (My Christmas gift to my conservative readers is to not mention names in this diatribe.) We MUST restore our tarnished reputation, rekindle our shattered  alliances, and generally restore the trust and respect that others have for us - on every continent. We have to work together to undo the disastrous decisions of the last seven years.

Our next president must be able to change the perceptions of the many people across the globe who don’t see this country the same way we do. We must all work hard to regain our credibility and once again earn the world’s trust. With better leadership we can fight effectively for international understanding and global peace. We can reduce our dependence on foreign oil, halt the spread of nuclear arms, slow down climate change, and attack ignorance, disease and poverty.

Our next president must pledge to restore an America of peace, liberty, justice and respect for human rights. Please think about these points over the next several months as you decide who will receive your precious vote.



Another Thirty Please

December 20, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 0 Comments

What a whirlwind our lives have become! Three weeks ago -  an awesome first grandchild. Then our baby graduates from college. And on Sunday Tom and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. LIFE IN THE FAST LANE !!!  The celebration actually started the evening before on December 15th. The Big Irishman presented me with an original Cami Thompson painting. Cami is a good friend who lives and paints with her husband John just outside of Taos, New Mexico. We were able to spend time with Cami and John during our trip to Santa Fe this Fall. They entertained us in their beautiful home and we got to see s Cami’s studio where she creates her gorgeous art. It was then that Tom and I fell in love with “Un Dia Con Mia Abuella” - “A Day With My Grandmother.”


 
I’ll see if I can even begin to explain why this painting had such a profound impact on me. If John and Jim, my brothers, are reading this post, they will immediately recognize the significance of the lady in the picture. She is my gentle, sweet mother. Mom’s pants were always slightly baggy in the rear because she had no hips. On most days her feet were  hurting. Doesn’t Abuella look like her feet hurt? Mom wore long sleeved jackets because in the winter months she was always cold. Even the stance and the slope of Mom’s shoulders were the same as Abuella.  But, most of all, both of these women loved their grandchildren unconditionally. When Tom and I first spotted this piece hanging on Cami’s wall, we were stunned. I miss my mom and think about her every day. Now that I am a grandma, I feel a renewed spiritual connection with her. I fell in love with the emotion and the depth of love that Cami was able to capture with her brush. Now I can be with my mom every day. I never dreamed that I would own such a beautiful and meaningful piece of art. Thank you Tom for a perfect  gift.

Sunday morning we drove to Sedona to spend a night in our Time Share. We were given a beautiful room with a view of the red rocks.

  

This is the view from our balcony. After cocktails in our room, we headed down to the main building for a celebratory dinner at JOEY’S, the fancy restaurant in the hotel.

The next morning we enjoyed a leisurely pot of coffee and some uninterrupted newspaper readage (new word) After checking out, and taking a few more pictures of Los Abrigados, we headed for the outlet mall in Oak Creek.

This tree is constructed with living poinsettias. We shopped until we dropped, and had a wonderful lunch. My husband bought me an antique silver bracelet. I am so spoiled. On the way home we drove through some beautiful country that was snow-covered. We had a great discussion about how we have handled the last thirty years and even came up with some goals for the next thirty.

As we said “Goodbye” to Sedona we agreed that we are among the luckiest people in the world. We have a really “good thing goin” This was the best anniversary ever.
Thank you, Perpetua. 

  

  



The Bank Of Dad Has Closed

December 18, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 1 Comment

For the last several years the Big Irishman has been eagerly anticipating an event that most fathers experience when their last child graduates from college: closing the doors of THE BANK OF DAD. Ha.

On Saturday our son, Thomas Patrick Brennan, graduated from the University of Arizona with a degree in Clinical Psychology. It was a very exciting and moving experience for all of us. I cried when I saw my handsome son in the processional at the beginning of the ceremony. I simply couldn’t believe that he had chosen to wear a tie, dress pants, and descent shoes - all without a word of nagging from Mom.


This is my kid and did I mention that he’s a college graduate?

As I was sitting in my seat listening to the Dean dispense words of wisdom in his opening remarks, my mind began to wander. I spent several minutes remembering other educational milestones in my son’s life. Perhaps one of the most poignant occurred over twenty years ago during the ride home from preschool. I was simply trying to get him to share the details of his day when I asked, “Patrick, what did you learn in school today?” Probably hoping to put an end to my incessant questioning, he calmly replied, “Mom, I learned it all.” Well, I don’t believe for a moment that a degree means he has indeed “learned it all,” but he has learned enough to make his way in the world.

As I glanced over at Tom, we made eye contact, and I noticed that he was also a little misty. We share a tremendous pride in our son’s accomplishments, and an abiding love for the man he has become. We look forward to sharing with him the life experiences that will help to build his future.

A special family moment. Tom looks so proud and I look so old.

Now about that “Bank of Dad” thing. I’m just gonna let Tom believe that the BANK OF DAD has closed its doors. But in truth, it is only under new management. THE BANK OF GRANDMA is now open for business.



When Your Kid Has A Kid

December 15, 2007 - Posted by amazingzipperedwoman- 1 Comment

As you can see from my new blog skin, the Brennan/Roberts Family has a new addition. I know I’m a tiny bit late reporting this, but I’ve been busy taking “How to Be A Good Grandma” classes. I just had my final exams - I passed every class except for “How Not To Spoil Your Grandchild. Enough about me …

Roscoe William Roberts arrived in the late evening on Sunday, November 25th. I will spare you the intimate details (mucus plugs, placentas and etc.) of his birth journey. Just a quick summation - FAST AND FURIOUS !!!!  This is probably the appropriate time to announce that Roscoe is the most perfect child ever born. He weighed 7 pounds and 8 ounces - a perfect weight. He measured 19 1/2 inches long - a perfect length. His first cry was perfect and melodious. He has the perfect hands of a surgeon and the long, perfect feet of an Olympic athlete. And the most amazing thing - perfectly gorgeous brown hair WITH BLOND HIGHLIGHTS. Have you ever heard of a baby with blond highlights? He strongly resembles a perfect little “California surfer dude.” Did I mention that he speaks perfectly fluent Italian, Spanish, and another language that we suspect is Swahili. This child is a whiz at doing six-number long division in his head. He gets a perfectly correct answer each and every time.


Less than a minute old.


A quick snooze after a long, tough journey.


First kiss.


Two Grandmas and a Grandpa.


Why do I have to wear this? All the guys will  think I’m a dork.


But Dad, I want to drive. (notice the toes)


A very proud papa.

One of the first things a new grandparent must decide is what name he or she wants to be called. Scott’s mom, Carol has decided that she wants to be called ”Grammy.” For several years I’ve entertained the notion of having my grandchildren refer to me as “Goddess.”  But now that I actually  have a grandchild, “Goddess” seems a little over the top. I’ve spent the last several days tossing around numerous names - Nona, Nana, Nonnie, Bomo, Dessa, Grandmother, Grandmere (french,) Prissy, Poopsie, Muffy, Buffy, Tuffy, Snookie, Snookums  and Cookiebuns - to mention just a few. I’ve finally made a decision. I shall be called, (drum roll please) “Grandmov” - pronounced Grammov (the “o” sounds like a short “u” as in “up.” Meghann, Katie and Patrick have always called me “Mov” and Tom “Pav”  - why, I don’t exactly know. So it only makes sense that Roscoe should call us “Grandmov” and “Grandpav.”  I must admit Tom and Mike, Scott’s dad, haven’t spent even a moment worrying about this very important decision. Go figure.

Now on a more serious note … Roscoe’s birth has caused me to think and feel in ways that I never have before. It’s as though I’m embarking on a much higher orbit, where I can see and experience much more of what the universe has to offer. A whole new level of sharing has been created as I talk to my child about her child. I feel deeply that the circle of those I must nurture and protect has opened to allow a new tiny voice to be heard. I feel tremendous pride as I watch Meghann and Scott ease into their new parenting roles. They make this major adjustment look so natural and effortless. Their great love for their child was immediate and of such  magnitude that I get tears in my eyes just watching them. Roscoe is a very lucky little man.

On each of the days since Roscoe’s birth, I have spent a great deal of time thinking about Perpetua. This experience has been made all the more precious because I spent several years unsure of whether or not I would live long enough to be a Grandma. Thanks to the family of my donor,  who gave me a wonderful gift wrapped in personal sadness, I am here and able to watch Roscoe grow and thrive.