Amazing Zippered Woman

Nona’s Gifts

“Nuestra Nona” -  “Our Nona”  The world has lost a wonderful lady - Camerina Lopez de Hoyos. I would like to tell you a little about this special woman and what she has meant to our family.  For many years we have enjoyed a great friendship with the Medina Family - Martha and Alberto and their daughters Sandra and Martha. Meghann and Sandra became friends in Junior High. Both families were involved in the Dobson High School Swim Team. I remember a wonderful night shortly after we met when our families laughed and danced until the wee hours. We have spent many enjoyable evenings together. Sandra flew home from Czech Republic for a weekend just to be in Meghann and Scott’s wedding. This is representative of the quality of the Medina’s friendship. I thank GOD often that this family is a part of our life.

When Meghann was in High School, Sandra invited her to spend the summer in Mexico with Nona. Nona is Martha Medina’s mother and Sandra’s grandmother. We were thrilled that Meghann was given this wonderful opportunity. Tom and I both think that travel and understanding other customs and traditions are absolutely essential. Meghann had already taken 3 years of Spanish and seemed to be learning it fairly easily.

About a week after her arrival in Mexico, Meghann called and wanted to come home. She told us that Nona had instructed everyone to speak only Spanish to her - no English allowed. What a wise woman Nona was. We encouraged Meghann to stay a while longer and try to settle in. Two weeks later, we got another call. Every thing was wonderful. Meghann even asked us to consider letting her extend her trip.  She was also well on her way to fluency in Spanish. This is the first gift that Nona gave our family.

Through the years, we have heard many stories about the devotion and love that Nona and her husband, Nono, shared. I feel that these stories and just listening to Nona talk about her husband helped Meghann develop a plan for the kind of marriage she hopes to have.  Nona’s example certainly is evident in the loving relationship that Alberto and Martha share.  This is another gift that Nona gave our family.

I met Nona several times, and although we had some difficulty chatting because of our language situation, a genuine warmth radiated from her. I loved to watch her face light up when she saw Meghann. She would engulf her in a huge hug. She truly loved my daughter. At her memorial service, the comment was made that Nona “considered all friends to be family and all family to be friends.” Remembering  this simple rule is a great way to proceed through life.  This is yet another gift that Nona gave our family.  

Thank You Nona - for your smile, your kindness, your generosity, your spirit and your many gifts to my family.

My Old Man

The Big Irishman celebrated a birthday last week. He turned 57. In all the years I’ve known him, he has been very casual about birthdays. For some reason this one was different. I wished him “happy birthday” when he got up at 5:15 a.m. on his special day, and he barely acknowledged me. In the past he has always said that each birthday was a moral victory. Apparently one of his high school teachers told him that he would be dead or in prison by his twenty-first birthday. (Can you imagine a teacher saying that?)

I asked him how he wanted to celebrate. I was positive he would suggest that I meet him at the door in my French maid costume and then seduce him on the dining room table - followed by martini sipping and wild dancing to the music of “Hogface and The Blossoms.” You can imagine my shock when he quietly mumbled something about meatloaf, green bean casserole and turning in early.

I worried all day, but dutifully prepared meat loaf and green bean casserole. I even made Apple Crisp hoping to cheer him up. While we had a drink before dinner, he did say that 57 seemed really old. I know that he has been working ungodly hours and is very tired. I also started thinking about the fact that I have a tendency to be so focused on myself that I rarely share with him the fact that I realize every day how lucky I am that he is such a huge part of my life. He is the best FATHER that children could have. He possesses every good quality that a HUSBAND should possess. He is a supportive, true FRIEND to others and a caring BROTHER and SON. He is a very knowledgeable FINANCIAL MANAGER and takes very seriously the trust that his clients have placed in him. He is a gentle LOVER and a tender LISTENER. I trust him with all my thoughts. Thank you GOD for placing the BIG IRISHMAN in my path. I think he is a very young 57.

       HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETHEART !!!!!!

What The Hell Is Wrong With Me

I think I need a great big kick in the butt. I just hope Perpetua doesn’t decide to give me a great big kick in the chest - if you know what I mean. I’m having a compliance crisis. In all the months before my transplant, all I heard from my team was compliance, compliance, compliance. This concept involves taking my meds on time, getting my labs done monthly, watching my diet, exercising and taking my vital signs first thing in the morning. I have no problem with the meds, probably because I know I will only live about 2 days without them. I’m more than willing to do my monthly labs because I’m forever hopeful that based on my blood levels, my team will lower dosages or do away with some meds. Diet and exercise are rough, but I do okay most of the time. It’s this vital sign thing that I’m having such a problem with.

Each morning for the rest of my life I am supposed to chart my weight, blood glucose level, temperature, blood pressure and pulse and check my feet and hands for swelling. The whole process takes less than 5 minutes. Each of these measurements can indicate a problem with Perpetua, and taken together they present a fairly clear picture of overall health. Until March I had never missed a day. I forgot one morning while I was visiting Meghann and Scott in Salt Lake City. When nothing bad happened as a result of my lapse, I guess I just got very casual about the process. Now I’m lucky if I check vitals twice a week. BUT WHY?

I’ve agonized over this and still don’t understand why I’m doing it or I should say not doing it, but I know it’s not fair to the woman whose heart I carry in my body. (Have I mentioned that I found out some things about my donor. Now I know that Perpetua came from a 29 year-old woman.) Am I just trying to feel normal? Am I tempting fate? Is this a way I can be non-compliant with no immediate threat to my life? I’ll continue trying to figure this out while at the same time attempting to clean up my act. If you see me - please give me a swift kick. PERPETUA DESERVES BETTER.

I Love Them Very Much

Meghann and Scott came home for the weekend. This was their first visit as a married couple. The Big Irishman even allowed them to sleep in the same bed. We spent hours chatting and catching up on all their latest. Scott is finishing his  Doctorate very soon and then they will be spending some time in southern California. They have established a beautiful system of communication on all levels. Meghann is still very high-maintenance and Scott usually forgets to call when he’s going to be late, but they have figured out a way to make it all work. They live, love and even argue with great passion. I love them both very much. It’s sure quiet around here today. I hate it when my babies leave.

Katie and Henry celebrated their first anniversary this weekend. Can you believe it has already been a year. (When I think about how close I came to not being here for my daughter’s weddings, I nearly come unglued.) Several celebratory activities were planned for this anniversary. The culmination was A special dinner. Katie prepared squash soup, a wonderful rice medley and coconut-crusted scallops for dinner. She wore her wedding dress and veil to serve and eat this fabulous meal. They used their wedding china, crystal and silver. Henry was enthusiastic about the whole plan and was in charge of wine selection and pouring. They are another wonderful young couple, and I love them very much.

I also want to update you on the “Little Prince.” Patrick is working hard to complete his senior year. He has a new girlfriend - Virginia - who we will meet next weekend. He has a great group of friends and has made huge strides this past year. He is really turning out to be a wonderful man and I love him very much.

So as not to disappoint those who depend on me for political direction — I think the American people are finally starting to “GET IT.” They are tired of having an illiterate, wannabe cowboy running the country. (I hope I didn’t offend any real cowboys.) He isn’t making us safe, isn’t creating jobs, and isn’t making it any easier to pay for health care. The Republican leadership isn’t helping the situation at all - unless you’re rich, you have stock in oil companies, you love war, or you tolerate lies. People are also starting to understand that Bushie’s policies are being advanced because the congressional majority are enablers and rubber stampers. Things are about to change. There are gonna be some new kids in town. 

Bad Girls

You have all heard that old theory that every woman secretly wants to be involved with a “BAD BOY.” Well, I’m going to expand on this theory. I think that way down deep, almost every woman, at some point in her life, really wants to be a “BAD GIRL.”

You know the type - garish eye shadow, teased big hair, a push-up bra worn under a tight, skimpy top, a flashy mini-skirt, and 5 inch spike heels worn over fishnet tights. A ”BAD GIRL” usually talks tough with a cig hanging out of her mouth, and hits on guys in bars always with a drink in her hand. She dances wildly and frequently utters sexual innuendos and her conversation is peppered with foul language. A “BAD GIRL” is overly confident, afraid of nothing, and lives life in the fast lane.

I have no desire to live every hour of every day of my life this way because I find many of these qualities deplorable, but every once in great while I have thought it would be fun to be a “BAD GIRL”  for a day. Soooo I decided to try it.

I applied massive amounts of bright green shadow and silver eyeliner to my eyelids. Unfortunately, gravity seems to have tucked my lids under rolls of collapsed, upper-eye skin - so very little of the look was visible to the casual observer. I had better luck with the teased hair, although I did have to use one of Tom’s brown socks as a support structure. The push-up bra pushed and pushed, but my “girls” love their present location down around my waist. The skimpy top seemed to accentuate my tummy rolls and the mini skirt kept riding up and revealing my old-lady underpants. Spike heels are out of the question - I fell twice walking out of the bathroom. My orthopedic loafers worked just fine. The fishnet tights really irritated the skin on my thighs. I don’t know how those fish can stand it. 

I can’t smoke because of Perpetua, so I substituted one of those short golf pencils for the cig. After several attempts I was actually able to talk with  the pencil hanging out of my mouth.  Tom was working late so I was free to hit the bar about two miles from our house - THE 929 TAP. When I arrived, I ordered a drink, put my pencil in my mouth, and settled onto a bar stool next to a gentleman in his seventies. I figured I’d start old and work my way down to the younger guys. I looked at him, batted my eyelashes a few times, and said, “Hey sailor, wanna party?” He promptly laughed, picked up his keys, and left the bar. Not to be discouraged, I stepped onto the dance floor and began dancing wildly, flailing my arms and making short jumping leaps. About every 3 or 4 seconds I yelled, “Sex” or “Do it in the dirt.” (sexual innuendos) I was starting to get some attention, so I ramped thing up a bit by yelling, “Rats, Poop, and Butt-Head.” ( foul language)

After about 10 minutes I was so exhausted from wild dancing and shouting, I got in my car, went home, brushed my hair, washed my face and put on my flannel nightgown. When Tom got home, I was in bed and sound asleep. I AM A BAD GIRL AND I HAVE A SECRET LIFE. Perpetua disapproved of the whole adventure.     

BUY RED !!!!!!

Last week Bono (of U2 fame) and Oprah launched a project - A major project in Chicago.  Bono devised this amazing plan to generate aid for those infected with AIDS in Africa. The premise is actually really very simple.  Many of the nation’s retailers have agreed to sell a variety of items (some are red and some are not) and then return up to 50% of the profit from each sale to a volunteer foundation that provides medication and aid. The displays of this merchandise are clearly marked. This is a painless way for you and I to really make a difference. We all need to BUY RED and support these generous retailers who believe in “giving back.” 

Just out of curiosity - how do all you Christian right-wingers out there feel about the recent revelations by a top Bush aid. It is his contention (and this has been substantiated) that top-level members of the administration refer to members of the Christian right as “lunatics” and “embarrassments” and people who need to be “watched carefully.” You are objects of scorn and the butt of jokes in the oval office - all this after Bush takes your money. Also, how do you feel about the promise George made you if you would just give him your vote. You remember - the 8 billion (B as in billion) dollars he promised you for faith-based initiatives. To date you have received a little under 60 million (M as in million). Is it possible that this pillar of moral rectitude and veracity actually lied to you?  

WHY ME?

I awakened this morning with an incredible feeling of pressure on my chest. Mt first thought was - WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME? When I fully opened my eyes, I discovered a huge black cat sitting on my chest staring at me. I wondered to myself - How in the world did a huge black cat gain entry to my house when all the windows are screened and the doors were closed. In an instant I glanced at the window only to see a large bird sitting where the screen was supposed to be. Upon further inspection, I determined that all the screens were missing. And yes - the cat and the bird got into a huge confrontation. Suddenly the phone rang. It was my next-door neighbor telling me to turn on the TV for some breaking news. It would appear that in the night, terrorists,  had stolen every screen in the Phoenix metro area. Authorities suspect that they plan on constructing and launching a deadly “screen bomb.” WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?

I made my way into the bathroom to brush my teeth. As I was brushing several of my teeth began to fall into the sink. Of course, none of the cascading teeth were back teeth that remain hidden from view. They were all front teeth. My smile looked like a huge black hole. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME? As I was entering the shower, I became wedged. For some reason my butt had expanded during the night to about five times it’s normal size. The scale confirmed my suspicion - 412 pounds. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME? Then I remembered. Today is Friday the 13th. I’m going back to bed for the rest of the day. I’ll talk at you tomorrow.

“Out, Damned Spot.”

A big “thanks” to William Shakespeare for lending me one of his lines from Macbeth to use as a title for this post. I certainly don’t want my Blog to become a forum for household hints, but this miracle is just too good to pass up - especially because everyone I know and love drinks red wine and spills are a part of living life in the fast lane. (Please note the color of this post. Does it remind you of red wine?)

During one of the wild parties we had while I was in Canada, a full glass of red wine was spilled on the carpet in the cottage we were staying in. A hush fell over the crowd, and I watched the color drain from Donna’s face. I would imagine she was forming a mental picture of her damage deposit slowly being flushed down a toilet that was shaped like a wine bottle. I experienced some difficulty breathing because I think I may have been the perp. who barely bumped the table which led to the eventual spillage. While Donna and I were fighting to regain our composure, Holly simply stated, “Not to worry. I’ll take care of this.”

She asked for table salt which she poured generously all over the wine stain. After waiting about ten minutes, she vacuumed the entire area. The stain was better, but the whole area still resembled the scene of an ax murder. She then requested a bottle of white wine. I thought she was going to take a break and enjoy a quick belt. I was wrong. She began pouring the white wine everywhere there was a red wine stain. We waited a few more minutes and then she started dabbing the spots with dry paper towels. VOILA! The stains were totally gone. She finished the miracle by lightly washing the area with a damp cloth and a little dish soap. Magic! Holly is my new HERO!

A new study says that hundreds of thousands of Iraqis have died as a result of the U.S.-led invasion - 601,027 to be exact. When I read this in the morning paper, I felt like I had been kicked in the gut. Bully Bush denies the veracity of this figure. Gosh I’m shocked. As I have asked before, “How does George Bush sleep at night?”

Twenty-Somethings

I get really tired of reading and hearing about how irresponsible and self-centered the younger generation is. I want to give you two examples of why I think Twenty-Somethings don’t deserve all the bad press.

Two weeks ago Tom and I attended the wedding of two of Patrick’s friends. These kids haven’t had an easy time of it, and had little or no support from their families. You wouldn’t have believed the beautiful day the bride and groom created with very limited resources. It was a magical ceremony - gorgeous bride, handsome groom and tons of love. For me  it was especially poignant because I knew the sacrifices this young couple had made for their special day. At the reception Tom and I sat at the “kid’s table” with Patrick and several of his friends. I was fascinated by their conversation. These Twenty-Somethings are doing all the right things - including offering much support and encouragement to each other as they strive to attain goals and deal with those “little bumps in the road.” We are very proud to call each of these kids our friend. My son is fortunate to be part of this group.

Last Saturday night we attended a fundraiser for a new charitable foundation - East Valley Sol. It was formed by Buck and some of his friends from high school. Buck is one of Tom’s partners. Through the years this group of Twenty-Somethings has discussed a variety of joint ventures. Everything from a bar to a restaurant has been considered. Finally, their path became clear when the daughter of one of their own was faced with a tragedy. Brooke, a beautiful twelve-year-old, broke her leg during a recess football game. It was during the treatment for this break, that bone cancer was diagnosed - a very scary form of bone cancer. Buck and his cronies quickly put together a charitable foundation, with Brooke named as its first recipient. I wish you each could have attended the bash these young people planned and executed. WOW! WOW! WOW! There was dancing with both live music and a DJ. There was a glorious spread of Mexican food, and both beer and Margaritas were flowing freely. There was a silent auction followed by a live auction and both featured many incredible offerings. To top off the evening, a casino catered to the gamblers in the crowd. The high point was a video of Brooke that really told the story of her courageous journey. Then we got to meet the guest of honor when she climbed up on the stage and chatted with the crowd. This child has more courage in her little finger than I will ever have. It was a wonderful evening - made possible by a group of Twenty-Somethings who just want to “give back.” Tom and I are very proud to call Buck a friend.

I can’t let you sign off without a brief political comment. While we are all trying to decide how much the Foley scandal has hurt the Republicans or helped the Democrats, let’s not lose sight of the fact that there are victims involved in this mess. These Pages have had their ability to trust shattered and their innocence destroyed. Shame on all of us for focusing on the “politics” of this situation.

I’m So Cool

 Yesterday I had a “feelin’ poorly” day. I have been having some back issues and decided to try ALEVE. Never again! My blood pressure took a nose dive and I felt  strange all day - very scary. Sudden changes in the way I feel always convince me that I’m rejecting. I need to learn to roll with the punches.

Now I want to tell you all about how cool I am. I’m with it. I’m the best Mom in the world. I’m sooo tech savvy. I’ve got the world by the tail. My family is extremely lucky to have me. I FIGURED OUT HOW TO TEXT MESSAGE !!!!! It is really empowering to know that I can communicate with Katie while she’s teaching, Patrick while he’s attending class, and Meghann while she’s in a meeting. I can even send       x-rated  messages to Tom while he’s meeting with clients. What a great feeling. 

The times - they are a changin’. I can remember when Tom got a car phone. He was selling sunglasses at the time. The charge to make a call from the car was $1.00 per minute. One night we let the kids make a call to Grandma from the car phone. They each got to say a quick “hello” and the whole time Tom was timing them. I can remember thinking that this car phone  concept was a small miracle. Now billions of people have personal cell phones. These phones not only allow us to talk to each other, but they take, send and receive pictures,  provide Internet access, and let people know the latest sports scores. But the greatest feature of all has got to be TEXT MESSAGING. I think for the next several weeks I’ll be spending lots of time bugging my kids constantly. I’ll also enjoy sending sweet nothings to the Big Irishman on an hourly basis. I’m so bad. 

Every day when I read about the rapidly rising death toll in Iraq  (both Americans and Iraqis) I get sick to my stomach. This carnage is so senseless and immoral. I read an article last week that outlined what I think is a great idea. Many of our children joined the military forces of our country believing their role was to assure liberty and justice for all under our constitution. I think they should all be offered the opportunity to opt out and void their enlistment. They were sold a “bill of goods” and enlisted under false pretenses. They were lied to by a corrupt administration who uses aggression to seek global power. And now it has been revealed that our government will join barbarians in the use of torture. All soldiers should be given the choice of returning to a nonmilitary status. Don’t believe for a moment that the compromise on torture that was forged last week does away with torture. Bush will do anything necessary to achieve his hidden, personal goals. After all, we all know he is above the law.