Amazing Zippered Woman

QuickBooks F C (FAT CHANCE)

In my duties as office manager/CEO of Tom’s new company, I was required to set up some kind of accounting program. We now have a payroll to meet, business expenses, and quarterly taxes to pay.  I’m a little nervous about this tax situation. I had a dream not long ago that I was being tortured in some secret prison because I had neglected to keep accurate records.

At the suggestion of a friend, I bought QuickBooks Pro 2006 for small businesses. I really liked the fact that the word “Quick” was part of the name of this program. I was sure that this word promised that I word figure out the program ”quickly.” I spent about an hour reading through the manual, and it became increasingly clear to me that I was in way over my head. I ran right out and purchased  QuickBooks for Dummies.  I’m sorry to report that my purchase wasn’t a great help. So I jumped in the car and once again headed for the book store. I bought  QuickBooks for Extra Dumb Dummies.  Finally after purchasing  QuickBooks for Really Ignorant, Barely Able To Read, Dummies,  I was able to open that little tray  that sucks in CD’s and install the program. After four 16 hour days I was finally able to print a check for Tom’s Sale’s Assistant; Kris. She was a bit shocked at all the extra 0’s. I told her to just consider the extra thousands an early Christmas present. No way was I going to attempt to create a corrected check, mostly because I don’t have a clue how I created the first one. The computer printer just suddenly spit it out. Probably the neatest thing I learned is that “interface” doesn’t refer to a sexual position.

Bob Woodward is my new hero. I can’t wait to buy his book.

He has exposed even more lies and deceptions coming out of the Bush White House. When will the American Public say,  “Enough is enough.”

Ramadan

The explosive political rhetoric which seems to be the norm today has created a huge group of people who really believe that Islam is the religion of Satan, and all Muslims are terrorists. I have received two emails recently that illustrate clearly how misinformed many among us are. One email referred to Muslims as stupid and filthy, and encouraged us all to do whatever necessary to encourage them to leave our country. The second article was just more of the same. This pervasive attitude just makes my blood boil.

I wonder if the people who espouse these ideas have any idea what Muslims actually believe. Over a billion Muslims around the world have just begun their celebration of Ramadan - the month of fasting. It commemorates the ninth month of the Muslim calendar - when the Angel Gabriel started the verbal delivery of the Quran to Muhammad. Observant Muslims don’t eat or drink anything during the day and hope that their fasting will bring a deeper level of spirituality. This fast can be rendered meaningless if spoiled by lying, slandering, talking about others behind their backs, swearing, being greedy or being covetous.

Muslim fanatics (there are fanatics in all faiths) have discredited Islam in the eyes of too many people. I don’t know why anyone would be threatened by such a gentle belief system. The tenets of Islam don’t correspond to my beliefs, but I respect the message found in the Quran. The doctor who placed Perpetua inside my chest happened to be a practicing Muslim and I thank him in my thoughts and prayers every day.

It’s my understanding that George is  going to declassify only portions of the terror report. Gee, I’m shocked!  Could it be possible that there are things in that report he doesn’t want the American public to read?

Message to Moms - Trust Your Gut

 We had a wonderful weekend. On Saturday night we shared a fun, discussion-filled evening with four new friends.  Kris and Rick live near us so we hope to spend many more fun evenings with them. Cami and John live in Taos, New Mexico. Maybe we will visit them someday. I would love to get to know them better. It’s really uplifting to converse with people who really care about what is going on in the world- even if they don’t always agree with me.

Tom has been working very long hours getting the business up and running. We didn’t have much “marriage communication time” during the last week, so the hours we spent together on Sunday were very much appreciated. One of the things we love to do is read the newspaper together on Sunday morning. Tom usually makes one of his “big greasy breakfasts” while we chat about the week’s news stories and make wish lists as we look through the Sunday adds. We were having a great time together, until Tom read a very small local news article. It told about the arrest of a man who lived a few houses away from us all the years that my kids were growing up in the old neighborhood. This man, Jim, was arrested for child pornography and child molestation. He reportedly took pictures of a naked 12 year old girl. Through the years he opened his home to many foster children - all girls. My children knew and played with several of these girls. For some reason I could never explain, I instructed my children that they were NEVER allowed to be at Jim’s house. Something about this guy just plain creeped me out. Now we have to remember with sadness the faces of all the little girls who thought they would find safety in Jim’s house.  Instead they encountered a continuation of the horror that had been their lives before placement in this home. There must be an especially loathsome part of Hell that is reserved for men like Jim.

I’ll bet George’s spin doctors are working overtime trying to come up with explanations that counter the leaked intelligence estimates that the war in Iraq has placed us at an even greater risk of attack than we were in September, 2001. Watch the news carefully. In the next several days George will be spouting lies again. I shouldn’t say spouting. He will be reading these lies from a teleprompter which uses no big words or complex sentences.

A New Era

Don’t ever believe me when I say that I’ll blog with you tomorrow. I always have the best of intentions, but stuff happens. Perhaps you will forgive me just this once if I tell you what’s been happening in our family. The Big Irishman has departed from his previous place of employment in order to launch his own wealth management firm. It’s been a marathon, but from all indications, this may prove to be the best decision he ever made. (other than choosing me to be the mother of his children) Between setting up and decorating a new office and establishing an accounting system, I have been one busy lady. Did I mention that I appointed myself the CEO? Tom is the Grand Imperial Pubah.

I had planned to describe in detail all my adventures in Canada, but it all seems like a very long time ago. I do want to tell you a little more about my amazing honorary grandchildren - Ozzy and Tango. These two guys have to be among the greatest children on the planet. Not only are they adorable to look at, but they are fun and interesting to interact with. Their imaginations were a constant source of amazement for me. Adults could learn a lesson from the gentle way that Ozzy and Tango deal with their world. These children are examples of all things pure and good. They are a testament to the terrific parenting by Chad and Holly. Thanks again to Donna for sharing her precious grandchildren with me.

After returning from Canada, I spent a week in the Bay Area with Katie. She just signed her very first teaching contract and I helped her set up her classroom. It sure felt good to design bulletin boards again. She is teaching a preschool class for children with varying degrees of autism. I must say - Katie has a true gift. Tom and I are so very proud of her. At a later date I will be sharing with you an adventure Katie and I had during my visit. Sneak preview: The adventure involves wild animals and police.

I think George Bush becomes scarier every day. We have a section in our daily newspaper called THE VENT. It’s for people to express their opinions, however extreme. On Tuesday this entry caught my eye. “For those of you who think George Bush is a good Christian, how do you suppose Jesus Christ would choose to define torture?”

Perpetua Goes International

I’m home from my latest adventure and very anxious to catch up with my readers. I probably should discuss my travels during the next several postings to avoid typer’s cramp and also to keep you all from being totally overwhelmed by the details of my various journeys. I have put some miles on this terrific body (one of my short term goals is a more positive self-image.) I guess I’ll start with my trip to Toronto.

Donna and I made it to Toronto without incident. I’m happy to report that I made it through customs with no problem. Given that I’m on Bushy’s list, I totally expected to be surrounded by federal agents and strip-searched at gunpoint. I was almost disappointed when nothing happened. I guess I’ll just have to work at looking more sinister.

We spent Wednesday and Thursday in Toronto seeing the sights. Chad and Holly (Donna’s son and daughter-in-law) have recently purchased a new house in the downtown area. It is under construction, but the projects that have been completed are awesome. It will be a showplace when the rehab. is finished. Holly took us on a tour of several parts of the city. My favorite area was RONCESVALLES. It’s sort of a “little Poland.” Most of Holly’s food shopping is actually “marketing.” She shops in a variety of speciality shops. I was in a store that actually had about 150,000 kinds of cheese. I saw fruits and vegetables that I had never seen before. Another highlight of our time in Toronto was a slumber party in our hotel room with Tango and Ozzy, Donna’s grandsons. What happens at slumber parties stays at slumber parties, but I’ll give you a hint … late, late night movies and bed jumping. That’s all I’m going to say. Tomorrow I will tell you all about two very fabulous children and a place called “PENETANGUISHENE.”

Instead of my usual political comment, I just want to tell you what a joke Bushy is in Canada. The editorial pages in the Canadian newspapers are filled with insightful editorials and letters questioning almost every move he has made. There are even billboards depicting him as “the village idiot.” I was so proud to be an American.  NOT!